A Welcome Influx Of Views To This Blog

It took about 2 years to reach 600 views of my blog as seen on the counter.  I do not have a way of knowing how many people that really is as I do not know how many people have looked at this blog 2 or more times.  What I do know is that it is rather exciting to see that in around 4 days it looks as if there have been around 75 "hits".   I do appreciate when anyone takes a look at my blog.   I really just want to reach out and try to have an open discussion and to brainstorm about new ideas about how to actually bring the numbers down of cases of child sexual abuse.  

I have been reading every incest biography I can find.  The latest is "Love Affair" by Leslie Kenton.   Her father was Stan Kenton a well known person in the jazz world.  I have always read biographies but mostly of celebrities.  As I have delved more into this blog and a Facebook page of the same name I have found myself drawn to these stories and have taken them in as kind of my extended family.   A family of survivors.  I do not like to use the word "victim".  I am NOT a victim.  I am a Survivor!

I have also always loved documentaries.  Many different subjects.  I am always looking for a good documentary about child sexual abuse.  I want to see what direction they are going in.   I was pretty disappointed with the Lisa Ling show about pedophiles.  The documentary I thought was worth a look
is "Incest, A Family Tragedy".   To be honest, the very beginning is kind of slow, but it has some very compelling ideas about really addressing the issues and finding answers.  It is a available on Google Play, a relatively new feature.  You rent many kinds of movies and games.  The rental price on this documentary is $3.99.


If you want to reach me you can email me at:  addresschildsexualabuse@yahoo.com.

I was involved in public speaking for 15 years and have answered any and all questions you could think of.    If you are from my home town or just north and you are yourself a survivor of child sexual abuse, I hope that you have the support you need.  Please contact me if you need support or help getting the support.  I will do what I can.

Thank you all for checking in.  

Continuing To Reach Out To Family/Relatives

I have been in communication with two of my aunts on Facebook. One aunt from my mothers side, one from my fathers side of the family. I contacted both aunts and asked them to please ask my parents if they would like anything more to do with me. They have refused to answer any letter, phone call that I have made to them. It is classic passive aggressive. Since I did not really bond with either of them due to the sexual abuse in their house the passive aggressive route is not going to work with me. The aunt from my maternal side said she would ask. The aunt from my paternal side told me she would send me a long letter snail mail. The aunt on my paternal side was a nun for 20 years and was known as the wise matriarch of the family. She was a teacher for years and was very well respected. She also has refused to speak to me at all about this. I wrote about her in a very early post on the blog of the same name. I immediately wrote a private note back to this "once matriarch" and told her NO.....do not continue to placate me. Lets all put on our adult hats and make an adult decision. I told her I would travel to her part of the country and speak with ANY REPUTABLE therapist on whether I am mentally impaired or if I am a survivor of child sexual abuse. She did not respond to my last note. Knowing her she will send the snail mail and explain to me that she loves me but she can not support me. She will most likely repeat herself and I will continue to have less and less respect for her. I have 30 first cousins on each side of my family/relation. I can not tell you how many of them really hate me. It was a real shock to realize that when it first happened. I am a really nice person. I really am. I am sure that the people that hate me have no idea the inherent cruelty of their actions. I was always taught to feel empathy towards people who just don't understand a situation (for whatever number of reasons). I can not judge them as I am not in their shoes. There are just some things that are not forgivable. Lying to me or about me is one of those things. Tossing me under the bus and having almost an entire relation to turn their backs on me is another thing. Blaming me for breaking my mothers heart is an abomination. I know what it's like to have a broken heart. It happened when I was an infant and young child. I have stated it many times, but it needs repeating. The survivors of child sexual abuse outnumber the pedophiles, but we are outnumbered by the many who absolutely will not address the issue within their own family and will let their beloved brother or (insert your own suitable noun) come off as the poor wounded soul who was treated so horribly by the son/daughter. This is all because I dared to confronted my molester! To make one last comment about this post title, in my definition, family is a person who is a part of your life. A relative is someone you are related to. I have very few relatives who have chosen to be part of my life. If there is a person who is out there in the same situation, find friends who can Be your family. Do what you can to speak with a good therapist as far as the really big baggage. I try not to unload on friends with all that. Yes there are times when you can be there for each other yes, but go through the process of addressing the really heavy stuff with a trained person who knows what is needed to "weed your garden" and help you grow into the wonderful person you are meant to be!

A Message to My Pedophile

To my pedophile who took my childhood away.