Emotional Preservation

I was thinking of self preservation today and if I do not know the "book learned" knowledge of how it works I look it up online.  What I found was http://www.halecollege.com/3-methods-emotional-preservation.

I read and learned a little about, Blocking, Masking and Embracing.  

I am sure that every human being at one point in there life or another has used all of these methods of self preservation.  I feel that we all must try to do more Embracing.  By far that would be the most difficult to do but they always say there is strength in numbers.  What if we all faced the most difficult things together?   We have all seen this happen with natural disasters, why have we not seen this when speaking of child sexual abuse?  My thought is because it is a more emotional subject.  What if there was a more in depth study and application of Emotional Preservation as it applies to incest and child sexual abuse?  

With working on this blog, trying desperately to learn iMovie for the PSA for this blog and working a full time job while trying to have some semblance of a social life to stay sane, for now I will have to put 

the task of researching how emotional preservation applies to child sexual abuse on the back burner.  There are priorities I have before I drop everything to focus this research.

So there you have it.  Isn't that in part what happens when a family first hears about the subject of incest or child sexual abuse in their own relation?  The priority is the family unit and to lose one person, the person who was sexually molested or jeopardize the family unit as a whole, is essentially what happens to many when the family unit tosses the survivor under the bus.  

“... and to every action there is always an equal and opposite or contrary, reaction...”
― Isaac Newton

How does this Isaac Newton quote compare to the following epic poem? 

                                              "Solitude," by Ella Wheeler Wilcox (1850 - 1919).




Laugh, and the world laughs with you: 
Weep, and you weep alone; 
For the sad old earth 
Must borrow its mirth, 
It has trouble enough of its own.



Sing, and the hills will answer; 
Sigh, it is lost on the air; 
The echoes bound 
To a joyful sound, 
But shrink from voicing care.



Rejoice, and men will seek you; 
Grieve, and they turn and go; 
They want full measure 
Of all your pleasure, 
But they do not want your woe.



Be glad, and your friends are many; 
Be sad, and you lose them all; 
There are none to decline 
Your nectared wine, 
But alone you must drink life's gall.



Feast, and your halls are crowded; 
Fast, and the world goes by; 
Succeed and give, 
And it helps you live, 
But it cannot help you die.



There is room in the halls of pleasure 
For a long and lordly train; 
But one by one 
We must all file on 
Through the narrow aisles of pain.


         And then there is the less eloquent view of how to look at things with the "He Who Smelt It Page. 
http://werbach.com/stuff/smelt.html

HE WHO SMELT IT, DEALT IT.
He who denied it, supplied it.He who deduced it, produced it. He who attributed it, distributed it. He who detected it, projected it. He who perceived it, conceived it. He who expressed it, compressed it. He who related it, deflated it. He who protested it, foam-crested it. He who derided it, provided it. He who maligned it, designed it. He who smelled it, expelled it. He who opined it, refined it. He who rued it, brewed it. He who revealed it, peeled it. He who quipped it, ripped it. He who knew it, blew it. He who reported it, exported it. He who decoyed it, deployed it. He who averred it, disinterred it. He who eschewed it, spewed it.(Submitted by Stephen High) He who mocked it, knocked it.(Submitted by Robert Spoelker) He who tells of it, smells of it it.(Submitted by Robert Spoelker) He who spoke it, broke it.(Submitted by Jessica Zirkel) He who disclaimed it, enflamed it.(Submitted by Geoff Knaak) He who noted it, floated it.(Submitted by Mr. Jimmy)	He who said it, shed it.(Submitted by W.J. Tifft)He who relayed it, made it.(Submitted by W.J. Tifft) He who thought it, wrought it.(Submitted by Keith Davis) He who unearthed it, birthed it.(Submitted by Barry T. Smith) He who sensed it, dispensed it.(Submitted by Arthur Jackson) He who sensed it, commenced it.(Submitted by Jordan Peterson) He who spoke it, broke it.(Submitted by Jim Daley) He who disputed it, tooted it.(Submitted by Rick Robinson) He who squeaked it, cheeked it.(Submitted by Tim Culpepper) He who berated it, created it.(Submitted by anonymous) He who sensed it, dispensed it.(Submitted by Jim McDonnel) He who spurned it, burned it.(Submitted by Brucie) He who noted it, floated it.(Submitted by Ken Olstad) He who declared it, aired it.(Submitted by Brian Mitchell) He who blurted it, squirted it.(Submitted by Bret Madden) He who speaks it, reeks it.(Submitted by W.J. Tifft) He who spurned it, burned it.(Submitted by W.J. Tifft) He who committed it, emitted it.(Submitted by Sir k0sm0) He who shunned it, tail-gunned it.(Submitted by Check Jones) He who rebuked it, nuked it.(Submitted by Chuck Jones) He who hyped it, piped it.(Submitted by Chuck Jones) He who blamed it, flamed it.(Submitted by Matt)He who exposed it, composed it.(Submitted by Tracy Wright) He who relayed it, sprayed it.(Submitted by W.J. Tifft)He who damned it, grand-slammed it.(Submitted by Chuck Jones)

Not all of these apply but many do. 

Isn't one "movement" away from "he who smelt it, a load of CRAP?" 

Why can't we embrace the issues of child sexual abuse together; cry together and then move on? 


I have thought of another way of looking at addressing child sexual abuse in regards to this poem. 
What if we would say......


He or she who shared it, (shared the responsibility of speaking the truth about our connection to incest and child sexual abuse)  Spared It!  (We could spare the heart ache this will cause if Not Addressed)   Heart ache for the little boys and girls who will be molested.  Remember, RAINN reports that there are 6 million incidents of child molestation and only 80,000 are reported.   We would also spare the heart ache of the mothers who would never believe that their husband would do anything sexual with their own child.   


Are you a part of the 5,000,020,000 who are not counted?