Monday, January 28, 2013

Please Copy and Paste this Video To Advertise This Blog.



This is a repost of my little movie to bring more traffic to this blog and help heal people caught up in this epidemic.  Thank  you for checking in and thank you for your help in this.  

Tuesday, January 22, 2013

No "Tag" or Evidence Left After A Near Death Experience

I was recently at a doctors office to get help with a case of bronchitis and/or walking pneumonia.
In the questionnaire at the doctors office they ask if you have survived sexual abuse.  At the end of the visit they ask if I had any questions.  I did.  It was a question I had thought of years ago but only now had the opportunity to ask.

I explained my situation about my survival of sexual abuse and part of that survival was my near death experience that occurred when I was 4 years old.

The way I posed the question is this.

If a tree is in a forest fire and lives, many years later if someone should cut down that tree you can clearly see at what time of the trees life that that forest fire took place.   My question is, "If a person experiences a dear-death experience, is there a way to investigate and is there some kind of "tag" or evidence that there Was a near death experience.


The wonderful female doctor was somewhat taken aback by my question and was surprised that I actually remembered something that happened so many years ago.  She also told me that her own mother lived through a near death experience as well but not due to sexual abuse but by a medical procedure.   She explained because of her mothers memories of the near death experience made her not be afraid of death.  It was a comfort to her mother and to the doctor herself.

The answer from this wonderful doctor was, "No, there is not a way to investigate or find any "tag" of any kind due to the survival of a near death experience that could be found in the body.

Kind of a pity.

The outline of my personal survival is on this blog titled, Each Survivors Story Is Important.  This was my second posting and it was from 2/4/10.

I believe there are some people who could verify this this but I hold out little hope that they would ever come forward.   It's not that I am a very negative person, it's just that the pattern of non support speaks for itself.


Monday, January 21, 2013

Dark Humor (?)





What If some manufacturer combined these two products?!? 


Would THAT protect children from being used as sex objects? 








Every Person Needs To Belong To A Community

Recently I did a search of the word "community" to investigate how many different places a person could reach out to be a part of a group.  A part of a like-minded group to share and grow and help each other.  There are literally thousands of communities out there.  Of course there are the neighborhood communities, sports communities, theatre communities, reading club communities, scrap booking communities etc.  The list is endless and continues to change and evolve.  Some fall away as likes and trends change and there are lifelong communities as well.  Family can be a wonderful community, as are some of your lifelong friends who you see after many years and speak with each other as easily as you ever did.

I did the search about the word "community" because I believe that everyone should be a part of Some Kind Of Community.   Over the years there have been some people who have been rather shocked and saddened when they find that I have from an early age lived my life in a very solitary way.    Of course it was lonely at the beginning as the sexual abuse began when I was an infant.   I became comfortable with myself and spent most of my young life by myself.  I drew and painted and created many different crafts.  I remember most of the time when I was young the other children had to actually coax me into joining a game.  It happened dozens of times.  I believe that there were some times when they just finally gave up and were tired of doing this crazy act for this crazy person.  I do not blame them.

As it is now, I have somewhat been more on my own.  I feel right now I am part of a "Community of Survivors."  I socialize with friends from work sometimes and go out for a few cocktails and happy hour foods.  I go to an occasional  movie sometimes with a friend, sometimes by myself.  I find myself going to the 3D animated movies by myself as I don't know anyone my age who needs to be more of a child since I didn't have one.  But that's OK.  I now get to be a child.  Better late than never.

I hope you can sit back  and take a look at where you are in life.  To be part of a Community is Paramount and Not just for a Sexual Abuse Survivor.    We ALL need social interaction.   Part of the problem is that we don't all get training in social interaction or in a case like me there were bumps in the  road.  We All have bumps in the road.  There are always bumps if there is a history of drug use, or alcohol abuse or sex abuse.  The social graces fall to the wayside when you are engulfed in one or more of these issues.

Please be good to yourself and reach out to a like minded group to join and be a part of.  Search out a Community in your area  or on a Safe Community Online.  Be involved as you are comfortable with.        Maybe try once a week and grow from there.  Treat the people you meet with respect and find out about them and where they are in life.  When did they join the group?  What are there other interests?  Ask about some of the history of events that have happened in the past.  Grow as a person and help grow the Community that you Join!

Every Person Needs To Belong To A Community


Sunday, January 20, 2013

The Latest Stats for Page-views To Date



Pageviews by Countries



United States
1986

Russia
444

Germany
122

United Kingdom
116

Canada
62

India
62

Australia
40

Netherlands
40

Ukraine
19

Finland
17

Thank You to all who have checked out this blog.





Sunday, January 6, 2013

Fatherly Advise

I keep thinking of something my "father" said to me many years ago.  It was during a period of time where I was only able to speak in a whisper.  I was That traumatized by the sexual abuse I had survived.

My father and I were in the kitchen and he told me, "Speak up for yourself!  Have some self respect!"

At the time there was not a detailed example of "what" I should stand up about.  Somehow my "father" was not thinking of the 9 years he sexually molested me.  In essence my "father" gave me the push and the "permission" to stand up for myself.   The consequences are the rub!  You may never think of your mother as your mother as you did not bond with her.  You may be ostracized by your siblings.  You may have droves of relatives who ignore you and toss you under the bus.   Yes I did change my name, yes I did change my religion, yes I did not follow much of the advise my parents gave to me.  For my health and wellness are the only reasons I made these choices.  Unfortunately it seems that there are many relatives who are very angry for my choices.  Sorry. 

In the Gnostic Christian way of looking at things, we all have chosen to experience what we are experiencing so I do not blame anyone for what I am living through.  In the same sense my "father" should not Blame me for what he is experiencing.  He in fact told me to "speak up for myself"!
If I hurt him severely by the tone and wording of the letter that I sent to him outlining all of the acts of incest and the child porn he involved me in, I can only say he taught me not to pull punches.  It was just the way he was with me.  It kind of reminds me of a few lines from "The Prince Of Tides".   The main mother and son in the movie are having yet another difficult talk and the mother asked, "Who taught you to be so cruel?"  He looks her right in the eye and does not blink, "You did mama, you did."

It's a sense of comfort but not a great sense of comfort knowing that all that is not resolved here on this plane, Will be resolved on The Other Side.  (Heaven) or what ever word  you use for how you view what happens when we meet God again.    Whatever you are dealing with in your relationships, know that there will be resolve.  We still need to experience these things to grow.  In part that is what I think.
When we cross over, in our time, it Will become much more clear.